Sadie Hollis : Home Birth

Sadie Hollis,
  On the wonderful, marvelous night you were born.

The back story goes like this: In December of 2016 on a Wednesday night Jones stayed with us while Jordan drove for the van ministry at church. When she came to pick up Jones she said she was, "so tired she could cry". The next day or maybe even later that same night she told me she was pregnant. I laughed and laughed and laughed. I was so happy for her and so happy that I wasn't pregnant. Or was I? Over that next week I became increasingly paranoid that I, too, was pregnant. Jordan encouraged me to take a test and I was in fact PREGNANT. Your Daddy and I were smiling, laughing, hugging and kissing. Just like we did when we found out we were pregnant with your brothers. And just like the two times before, your daddy prayed.

Fast forward to our second and last u/s at 20 weeks. Hank was set on you being a "sister" from the moment we told him we were having a baby so he went with us to Dr. J's office. I had a dream the night before about our appointment and what happened in my dream is exactly what happened in reality. 3 lines. We saw 3 lines and just like that I was dreaming of what my DAUGHTER would look like and who she would be. Your daddy was shocked but your brother was not. The look of shock on your daddy's face was of no worry to me. He rises to every occasion and is such a pillar of strength and steadfastness.

My pregnancy with you was not without challenge. I felt strongly that I was to birth at home and finding a midwife that was willing to travel to Alabama for a woman who has already had two precipitous births, took about two weeks. Not long after finding a midwife and a doula I was diagnosed with gestational diabetes. I was so discouraged. I already ate a diet healthier than everyone in my life, was there room for improvement (of course but I was emotional and irrational)? How would I avoid the meds, but more importantly how would I avoid the unwanted side effects from the meds? The diabetes education class at the hospital that was mandatory for insurance purposes was of zero help and the information on the Internet was useless also. Thankfully my beloved OB was still doing my prenatal care and spent hours with me at several appointments EDUCATING me. We went through every page of my food and exercise journal figuring out exactly what my body could tolerate at what time of each day. Dr. Johannson assured me that I could do this and that as long as I took care of myself that this condition would not interfere with the birth I was dreaming about for you. He was right and once he helped me get my diet straightened out I felt better than ever! Anything for my babies! After my diagnosis I didn't gain a single ounce and prayed daily that you would be born at the perfect weight on the perfect date (having a big gestational diabetes baby was intimidating to me and I also didn't want to have a home birth and have to worry about baby's blood sugar after delivery).

Now for the big event! Our home birth supplies were ready to go and the boys and I had been watching water home birth videos on YouTube for weeks. Our ESTIMATED due date was Tuesday, August 8th. We woke up that morning and your daddy went to his first day of school (with students) and I took the boys to story time at the Anniston library. Hank and Miles enjoyed it and so did I. That night I walked up and down the auxiliary road while Miles followed me crying and having a two year old meltdown. At one point I think Hank was crying too. I jokingly told Mom and Paige that they must know it's almost time. We put the boys to bed around 8 or 9 and curled up on the couch for a few episodes of Friday Night Lights. Your daddy and I exchanged foot rubs with coconut oil and ylang-ylang. He concentrated on all the points on the ankle and shin that are said to help start labor. We headed to bed at 11pm and made guesses about how much you'd weigh. At 11:30 I had my first contraction and I hadn't fallen asleep yet. Before I go on, let me tell you about the Wednesday night before. I was up from 2:30am-8am with about 4 contractions an hour. I couldn't sleep through them but I also had to concentrate to breathe through them. I did a lot of hands and knees thinking you may  just be in a wonky position. The next day at my 39 wk appointment I asked Dr. J to check dilation (so I could tell my GA midwife where I was at after laboring during the night). I was already a very stretchy 5! So, back to the night of my EDD (a week later).  My contractions were 8 minutes apart for the first 2 and after that they got closer and closer. I called Jackie, our midwife, first and then Paige, Brittany and Jordan. Right after that my water broke while I was taking a break on the toilet- how convenient, no mess to clean! Will then called our doula, Sharon. All during this time I am leaning on the bathroom counter listening to my bethel station on pandora, swaying and singing. When I got tired I would just sit on the toilet and rest. Will was in the laundry room during this time. He already had the birth tub blown up and was trying to hook the hose up to the washing machine outlet to fill the tub up with water. So I am laboring alone and thinking to myself, "do not have her on the toilet". I knew there was no way Will would have the tub filled with water in time so I wanted to move to our bed but because my waters were broken I didn't want to deal with the hassle. I say to your daddy, "I don't know why you're fooling with that hose. We don't have time. I don't even care about the tub anymore." He continues to work knowing that I'm in transition and there is nothing he can do for me at this time. After a few more contractions Paige arrives. She is here for one or two contractions and then I tell them, "This is it. She is coming." I don't think either one of them believed me because it hadn't been one hour since my first contraction. During the next contraction I made believers out of those two and your daddy caught you in our bathroom at 12:28am. You started crying instantly and you were so pink and healthy looking. Your cord was very short- about 10 inches- so we sat and waited for our placenta to be birthed while you were skin to skin with me and wrapped in a gatorade towel (Coach's daughter). Sharon, the doula, and your Memommy arrived. After that (about 10 minutes) we took a bath together and floated our placenta in a bowl beside us. Then Daddy cut your cord and we made our way to our bed to cuddle and ride that birth high together. You were my smallest baby despite having diet and exercise controlled GD. You were 7 lbs (remember how I prayed for you to be the perfect weight?) and 18 1/4 inches. You had a head full of black hair and looked a lot like your brother, Hank. I have no idea what song was playing but we were listening to my bethel station on pandora. You were beautiful and perfect and your daddy said, "The Lord was so good to us. This birth went perfectly." He was 100% right. Having you was a powerful reminder of God's grace, protection, and goodness. Preparing for your home birth was exciting because I knew it was God's plan. He prompted me to birth at home and gave me perfect peace. I also knew we would birth unassisted because I birth faster than anyone could have made it to our house. Your brothers slept through it all so when they woke up it was better than Christmas morning. I'll never forget those bright eyes as they crawled in our bed and looked every inch of you over and held and kissed you. I believe they loved you deeply before they ever laid eyes on you or held you in their arms. The joke surrounding your birth was that there was a new OB in Alexandria- Dr. Will Ginn. Having your Aunt Paige there was very special to me. As you grow up you will understand why completely. Your Uncle Todd, Sally, Nana, Jordan, Brittany and Cora were all there the next morning.  They too will be some of the most important people in your life. Little girl, you are loved. I will always remember the wonderful, marvelous night you were born.