The Birth of Miles Nunnelly Ginn

{If words like "placenta" make you queasy... you should probably skip this birth story because I'm charting every detail.}

In October of 2014 Will and I were in the car having a "when do you want to have another baby?" conversation. I was sharing with Will how I don't feel like I have what it takes to be what God has called me to be as Hank's mother much less another child. Inadequacy I guess. I told him that I do not feel comfortable "planning" a family or "trying" for babies. To me, it feels like I am trying to play God. Like I know best or I know what the future holds/ should hold. I am SO aware that I do not know best. I told Will I wanted the Lord to decide and for him to just be like "You're pregnant and now is the time for another baby." I am so much better off trusting God. So, no decision was made but I did say I wanted a little bit more time because I was still nursing Hank around the clock and felt like a little time for my body to build up it's nutritional stores would make me feel more confident about getting pregnant.

In November of 2014 I complained that my boobs were so sore from Hank nursing more frequently while cutting his 1 year molars. Ouch! Fast forward to Thanksgiving. For some reason it hit me that maybe I should have already started by this point even though my cycles were still really spaced out from nursing. So, I sent Will to the DG. One dark line, one faint line. UM, WHAT DOES THAT EVEN MEAN?! Ha! So, off Will goes again for another test. No, make that 2 tests. With each test taken Will just laughed and said, "You are pregnant, I don't know why you keep taking tests.". I couldn't believe it. We had been very careful last month and basketball had just started and Hank still didn't sleep through the night so you know that makes things difficult. He was right. I was pregnant and I wasn't sore from Hank cutting molars. I was sore because I was pregnant. We went to the doctor at the end of December and Dr. J confirmed that I was pregnant and a week and half further along than I thought! Wow. Here we go again!

Enter all the emotions here. Emotional because the things I told Will I wanted from God in October happened. Emotional because I don't deserve to be loved like the Lord loves me. In scripture, songs, books, conversations... He is always romancing me and it is the most beautiful love I have ever known.

January of 2015 was a hard month for me personally. It was full of prayer, godly counsel, professional counsel, self assessment, and a lot of dying to myself so that He could be glorified. That, all of that, was worth it. This was such a time of spiritual growth for me. A time when I better understood my husband and his thought process. And I prayed. A LOT. For this baby boy. That he would be okay despite all of this turmoil inside of me. The Lord really used this time to draw me closer to him and ultimately I think he gave Will a better wife and our boys a better mother through this time of refinement.

Over the next months I prayed about this birth. I had already switched providers. Dr. J is fairly new to our area and uses evidence based care and practices for his patients. He was a dream to work with. My routine appointments are just that... routine and boring and such a blessing. I struggled some with Miles laying on my sciatica and blowing out all the veins in the back of my right leg. Both pretty painful. Other than that, a pretty great pregnancy that consisted of chasing a toddler every day all day. Will and I took Nancy Makransky's birth classes. She has a class for the first trimester, second trimester, and then the natural child birth class for your third. They were wonderful and Will enjoyed them as much as me, maybe more. This time was really special for me because for just a few hours over the weekend I could really dream about this baby without any distractions. I could dream of his birth, what he would look like, and who he would some day become. So special.

A few weeks before our edd I made some notecards with verses that I would need for encouragement, reassurance, to battle fear, and to battle anxiousness. I would read through them at night or during the day. I would put one over the kitchen sink or on the end table. One that was such a blessing to my heart, especially when I was 40 weeks was this:

It was so sweet to trust in him.

This is how it goes:

Facebook message and responses from some ladies that for whatever reason I felt confident in confiding in and trusted that they would truly pray for me.

Later that afternoon I reach out to Will (the most important person in my birth team) via text telling him that fear has set in, I don't know why, please pray. July 21 2:11pm his response, "Yeah baby but you know you got this. God is in control. Read your verses. He has been taking care of you and Miles for the past nine months. Trust him to take care of the last few days. I think it is the early due date that has got us anxious. It's all good though you are gonna shine. I just know it." 

Every time we prayed together (for weeks leading up to Miles' birthday) we just asked God to help us trust him. This becomes important later when I am left waiting and waiting and trusting in the Lord and his design of my body.

Earlier in the summer Will and I made a little business decision together in hopes to pad the savings account before I left work to be a SAHM. On Wednesday, July 22nd we closed that deal. Hooray!! We had already planned to take Hank to the museum in Gadsden that day and waited until after nap time since we had to finish our business deal. We had a really great time as a family of 3 and I just enjoyed that time with my baby knowing that sooner or later he would no longer be my only baby. After leaving the museum we went to Top of the River (with gift cards) to celebrate closing our deal. Hank killed some cole slaw, hush puppies, onions, and shrimp. We fed the fish, ducks, and turtles and headed home. Will joked, "that food is gonna make Miles come". We were running late and I wouldn't make it to church. I wasn't too upset though. I think I knew it would be soon and I was really enjoying our time as a family. Next on the agenda was cards at Ben and Purdy's at 7 or 7:30. So after resting on the couch and "wallowing" with Hank I got up to use the bathroom before we were to leave for cards. Pop. Gush. "Um, I think my water is breaking." W: "Are you sure you didn't pee on yourself?" Me: "Um no. You can smell if you want, it is not pee." We talked about what this meant and I told Will there would be no cards tonight but that I didn't want anyone to know my waters had broke. I was ready at this point but nothing was happening. However, my doula and I suspected I am a fast birther based on my birth with Hank so I gave her a call around 7:30 to let her know. I am so glad we spent this day like we did. It was such a great day.

I call everyone that was invited to Miles' birth plus my long distance sister. Hollie, Paige, Mom and Dad, Jordan, and Brittany. Such fun phone calls!

Text from my sister, Hollie. Wednesday July 22 7:25pm

"I am so excited. I don't think I will be able to sleep tonight. Praying for you. He has gone before you. You are ready. You are able. He is able. Every minute you are closer to meeting him! Love you!" 

 Around 8:30 I get in touch with Nancy. I tell her we have been on a walk and that we will probably go to bed like normal. She said that we would go to bed like normal but that she would be coming over to spend the night. Yay! Slumber party with Nancy!! We get back inside after dark and I tell Will that I want to put Hank to bed. I was thinking I might have a baby by morning and I wanted that time with him. And I cried. And cried. I bathed Hank and cried, I put his pajamas on and cried. Will asked if I was okay or if I was hurting. Not hurting, just overwhelmed by all the change that is coming. I read my baby some books, turned on his "Sing over me" lullabies and rocked and wept, rocked and wept. So excited to give Hank a brother but so sad all at the same time that our time together- just me and him- was over. Nervous about what he would think of a baby and if he would struggle with not being my only baby. Things I cried about before ever thinking about becoming pregnant. What a woman. Ha! Oh me of little faith. I pull it together and lay him down. I straighten the house, finish packing our bags, and Nancy arrives. Excitement is in the air. We talk and chat after not seeing one another for a couple of weeks. Will fills up all of our cars with gas.  Will and I munch on homemade granola I made earlier that day while rocking in the recliner. Then it is off to bed we go. I have a few very mild contractions through the night and fall asleep after each one. Hank was up a couple times during the night and the last time I begged Will to bring him to our bed. That baby gets in bed, puts his arms around my neck and says, "Hey Ma." Hey baby. "Night Ma." Night baby. Heart swelling. 

The plan for morning was to get up, eat breakfast and take a long walk if nothing happened through the night. We all wanted to avoid a day in the hospital. I only wanted to go to the hospital to squat and have a baby (as Nancy and I often joked). On our walk we saw Will's brother, Scott and my life long friend, Landry. Landry is Will's friend too I just like our history and that I saw him the day of my second child's birth. We get home and still nothing. Nancy texts Dr. J to tell him that SROM happened the night before around 7 and asked him what he wanted us to do. We all know what he wanted but we are still trying to stall at this point. Ha! She tells him that I will shower and we will head to the hospital. Hank goes down for his nap and I phone Dad to come play with Hank for the rest of the afternoon. Will and I shower and attempt to get some contractions started naturally with oxytocin. At this point I am feeling sad and questioning this whole thing. I know my body knows how to give birth. I did it less than 2 years ago and it went really well. So what is the hold up this time?? I text one of my spiritual moms, Cheryl and ask her to pray for me. Her response Thur July 23 11:11am: "I love you!! With my second my water broke at 9 that morning and I never had any contractions until that evening and she was born at 11:30. All was well! If you want or need me at ANY TIME you just have someone to call me. Your Elohim will be with you! He created this moment in time especially for you. Joshua 31:6 Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid and do not panic before them. For the Lord (Jehovah) your God will personally go ahead of you. He will neither fail you nor abandon you. Thank you for allowing me the priveledge of talking to our Father for you and your dear son!" Her response could not have been more timely or more perfect. The Lord knew the exact encouragement I needed in that very moment. I stood in the kitchen and wept. 

Nancy reminded me that I should eat a really good lunch because the hospital wouldn't want me eating after I arrived there. So I had a tomato sandwich, some cheese and basil, and a piece of leftover fish. Then we were off to the hospital and SROM was over 15 hours ago at this point. It was raining, it was pouring! I knew that rain would help me get Miles here. We arrive at the hospital and the nurses station looks really confused when they ask if I am there to have a baby and I say yes but I am calm and totally fine/normal at this point. So they show us to our room and monitor us for the routine 20 minute strip. I really loved my nurse with Hank and she recently had twin girls so I knew she wouldn't be there for this birth. I asked her who she would recommend and she said Haley and Janine. When my nurse came in for me to finish the last bit of paperwork I asked her her name. It was Haley. Of course it was. And Janine was also there that day and I'm pretty sure I was the only patient in L&D that day. The Lord was so sweet, once again. Haley was a dream come true. She assured me that they would do as little as possible to help me have the natural birth I wanted. She was so relaxed and let me call all the shots. What an answer to prayer to have Haley by my side that day. You see your OB routinely for 9 months and form a special relationship with them and you have your L&D nurse for one day and then feel such a special bond by the end of their shift. If you can't tell, I love my labor and delivery nurses.

Throughout the day we go on walks around the hospital, talk, listen to music, and I bounce on the birth ball. Around 2 Nancy suggests I take a nap if I am tired because I might be up all night working for this baby. I agree that sounds like a good idea but I am freezing so I want to go walk outside to warm up and then I'll nap. So Nancy stayed inside and listened to podcasts and Will and I walked around Anniston holding hands and looking at all the pretty old houses. We get back to our room, I get cozy, Will starts reading in Acts and Nancy is listening to a podcast and the teacher is preaching from the exact passage Will is reading. Woah. Okay Lord, we knew you were in that place but now we really knew. Such a cool moment. I close my eyes and in walks Haley a little after 3pm. She talked to the doctor and he suggests antibiotics since SROM has been greater than 18 hours. She gives me my options and we refuse the antibiotics and all give each other smiles of confidence knowing that was the right call for me. Haley says Dr. J will be by when he finished with his patients at the office and that it would be great if we could make something happen by that time. Haley suggests getting some oxytoxin flowing naturally and I joke that Dr. J can finish seeing his patients and then I can have a baby and he can go home and have dinner with his family. Everyone kinda laughs at me thinking that probably wouldn't happen seeing as I hadn't had one contraction yet. Haley leaves and closes the door. Will's head bows in prayer. Nancy is diffusing clary sage and is applying it to a spot on my leg while I bounce on the ball. BAM! Contraction. Thank you Lord, you are always on time. Over the next 30 minutes I have 2 or 3 more and get so pumped while having a thankful spirit that the Lord heard our cries and I would have my baby soon, intervention free! Then they get super intense, back to back, with no breaks (just like with Hank). Will calls mom who is at work across the street, Jordan, and Brittany. Mom and Jordan arrive. The tub is filled up, Will and Haley convince me to get in. Relief from some of the pressure!! I keep on talking about my strong desire to poop because with Hank I pooped at the very beginning of labor and it gave me room down there and released some pressure. But no poop for me although it did provide some laughs for everyone else in the room. Meanwhile Nancy is 2 steps ahead of me. She is applying pressure when needed, fanning me, plugging up fans, putting cool cloths on my neck. That woman was such a blessing to me on that day (and many many other days). I would encourage every mama to invest in a doula, there will be no regrets. Haley asks if I want my pandora station turned up so I can hear it. Yes! I was just thinking that but couldn't voice it because of the intensity of the waves. Nancy called Dr. J and is afraid she may have jumped the gun. He arrives and wants me out of the tub to see what is going on? He checks me and I tell him, "Just don't tell me!". Haha. He smiled and said, "Maggie, you are complete.". He leans up against the wall and tells me to get back in the tub if I want. I know now that he told me that because little Miles still had not dropped. So out of the bed I go and bam another contraction. I drop to the floor and squat on my knees, working with/against the contraction and tell everyone that he is coming. The next thing I know is I caught my baby in my hands and told everyone, "He's here!". Dr. J so kindly assists me with one glove on like we are playing football.(He later admits he underestimated me just a bit.) Skin to skin, bliss, joy, adrenaline. Seriously the most exciting and exhilarating hour of my life. My first contraction was at 3:30pm and Miles arrived at 4:53pm. He weighed 8lb 5oz and was 20.5 inches long. He had brown hair, the most beautiful hair line, thick thighs, and was -I kid you not- perfect! Still is! During the most exciting parts of labor Will went into coach mode. He was fist bumping Jordan and Dr. J and shouting encouragement at me. Afterwards Miles and I cuddled for 2 hours and it was glorious. Will was next to us smiling and telling me how awesome I did and that I rocked it. I could not birth our boys without Will. He is strong, encouraging, and such a pillar of strength when I need it most. As we were cuddling I started crying again for the 3254 time that day and told my birth team that I was NOT postpartum but that I indeed was completely undeserving of the love of my Lord and Savior. The way he took care of me that entire day and answered prayer after prayer and giving me the strength and encouragement I needed to birth the most precious second son was entirely humbling. He is so sweet, such a personal God, and so patient with me and all of my doubts. I do not deserve that kind of love. I have never felt more supported, loved, encouraged, and strong than during this pregnancy and birth. Thank you to my husband, wonderful OB and friend, Dr. Johannson, Nancy (my doula), my mom, Jordan, Haley (my nurse), my sisters, and all the ladies who lifted me up in prayer and reminded me of God's promises. I am so thankful for God's great design, the gift of birth and breastfeeding, and the freedom to choose how my babies are brought into this world. It is because of these things that my relationship with Christ has grown and is more real to me. In these things I also find so much confidence as a mother and woman. 

"Oh Happy Day" by Jesus Culture was the song playing when Miles was born. So appropriate and the perfect tempo for such a fun, fast, and exciting birth! If you haven't ever heard it, go over to YouTube and listen!  

Hank, you are the most fabulous toddler I know. You were so excited about Miles and still have so much pride in your eyes when we talk about your brother. You have adjusted so well and that is what is most important to me. Your happiness makes my heart swell. I can't believe I have 2 babies now and at the same time I can't believe we ever lived without Miles. I hope you two grow up to be strong in the Lord, leaders of your generation and your families, I pray the Lord provides courageous, Christ-following wives to be the mothers of your children. I am so proud of who you are,Hank, and pray that the Lord will rain down wisdom on your daddy and me while we raise you up. Life has slowed down a bit for now but give it some time and all four of us will be playing basketball, soccer, baseball, and catching huge bass out of the pond. I love you boys and feel so rich to be your mother and your daddy's wife. Psalm 127:3-5. 

*More pictures to be added later when I get them off of my camera...